Last Spring, as I was wrapping up my Educational Leadership & Policy credential/M.A., I sent out over 30 applications for various school and/or special education administrative positions. I had 8 interviews, was a finalist twice, and went 2 for 2 on job offers for teaching positions I interviewed for. One of which I took, in Marin County. Exhausting, but not too shabby!
One of those opportunities held particular weight and importance to me. The job was a newly created Program Specialist position. For those of you who have no clue what that is, and rightly so unless you're in my field, it's basically the administrator/s working directly under the Director of Special Education within a school district. These slots do NOT open up very frequently, particularly not in excellent districts like this one. I thought it was a long shot, being a rookie and out of district candidate, but I sent in my application/resume with great enthusiasm and with absolutely nothing to lose.
To my surprise and delight I was called for an initial interview, so I pulled out my old, trusty J. Crew pant suit and went for the first round interview. It was a high pressure, intense process with 10 or so scenarios requiring on-the-spot responses in front of 9 panelists(a big fear for me!), but somehow I survived AND ended up as one of two finalists for the position. In fact, post-interview I felt even more confident that I was more than prepared/equipped do this job well, and hoped so much that it would end up being mine.
I wrote this in my iPhone notes after the interview:
The next step was a Skype interview, which I'd previously never done. So, true to OCD form, I tested out camera positioning and location as well as Skype interview outfits with my BFF (A2) for about an hour the night before, said my prayers and went to sleep ready to present the best of myself (and hoping that would translate via Internet).
Trial run of my outfit yielded the the calm, collected, makeup-less picture you see below:
Here are a few shots I took of myself to see how I looked as I waited for their call to come in. Yes, I'm a huge dork, however please notice how precisely I kept the camera setup from the night before ;)
Trying to get rid of nerves. Looking like a blowfish.
I went with Dr. Pepper chap stick in the end. Ole faithful since 4th grade.
Without going into all the details, the final interview went REALLY well. So well that I felt 100% convinced, more than I've been of almost anything in my life, that the job was mine. I had no doubt...
However, the phone call I received was NOT what I was expecting. The Director of Special Education and Superintendent were both incredibly complimentary and gracious in my rejection. I asked what I could have done differently and they said, "nothing". That made me feel good, confused and frustrated all at the same time. They said it was an agonizing decision between myself and the other candidate, and in the end they had to choose one of us.
They did however ask that I apply for a Vice Principal position that was going to post in a few weeks. I did, because I believed in the district/their admin team and wanted to be a part of it, but my heart wasn't fully in it and, although I was interviewed out of 90+ applicants, I didn't get that position either. Rejection x 2 stings, but I was determined to keep my chin up, shoulders square and move forward. God has always been faithful in my life and I trust in his timing. When a door closes, it's sometimes the BEST thing even though it feels like the worst. Some of you may have seen this typical Ashley selfie/motivational post on Facebook and now that motivation may be more clear.
Flash forward 7 months, almost exactly...I moved my life from Sacramento to take a teaching job in Marin which brings me now within 20 minutes to the love of my life, AJ,which is such an amazing blessing.
Then, I got a phone call that changes (almost) everything.
The phone call was from the Director of Special Education from the district I mentioned previously. You know, the one where MY dream job was located?? Well, it turns out that (for reasons I won't get into) the person they selected moved back to Southern California leaving the position open, again. And it was mine if I wanted it!! I won't take up anymore space with details of my decision making process (but if you know me, you know I thought of EVERYTHING) or how within a week I accepted the job ON MY 30th BIRTHDAY (how's THAT for a present?!),was released with recommendation/blessing/graciousness from my current district, signed a contract for the job of my DREAMS as a Program Specialist with my new district, and made arrangements to move to the Peninsula mid November!!!
It has been a whirlwind and there are some tricky pieces to the puzzle, but through it all I feel a definite sense of peace that God is leading me in HIS timing to exactly where He wants me to be.
That makes me incredibly excited for what is to come. May the work I do and life I live in this world point to God's goodness and faithfulness.
I also must mention that I have the undying support of my amazing boyfriend, who means everything to me. His influence on me to be POSITIVE and believe in myself has made all the difference and I am so thankful and blessed by who he is.
I'll wrap this up by reiterating my post from Facebook from a couple days ago, which at the time very few people knew what I was rambling on about:
"God's timing is better. In big and small ways I've been denied things I thought I needed/wanted and, of course, within the time frame I designed for my own life. Yet, one of the most awesome and humbling experiences is to look back and see the ways I NEEDED to be changed and grow in order to receive those very blessing with the grace, gratitude, openness, humility and preparedness worthy of such gifts. When it seems like things are being withheld or denied, I believe that is often the very mechanism God uses to grow patience, resilience, perseverance, work ethic and countless numbers of LASTING traits in us that are worth far more than immediate gratification or any tangible. THEN, when the blessing comes our way, we can more clearly understand that that's what it is...Perhaps a well deserved one, but a BLESSING. Thankful life works this way. God is good and life is truly BEAUTIFUL."
So, that's my story.
I hope that it not only informs you of my crazy life, but maybe even in the smallest of ways inspires you to keeping chasing after your dreams, believing in yourself and the plan for your life, and fighting discouragement when that path is unclear or not going the way you planned. Love yourself and others well, be happy, give of yourself, work hard at whatever is in front of you, and good things will come your way!